coming out

Coming Out As Transgender

You’ve admitted to yourself that you are transgender. Now you wish to share this news with family, friends, and colleagues. You’re unsure of how to do so, but we are to try to help. Here are our top tips for coming out as transgender.

Read other people’s stories.
A great source of information is available online. Research ‘coming out as transgender’ and you’ll find a number of personal stories. See what resonates with you and then decided to forge your own path on coming out.

Select those you will tell.
You’ve decided to come out. Now you have to choose the person(s) that you will share this information with. It could be your best friend, a close family member, or simply someone that you feel is open to the topic of someone being transgender.

Write your coming out.
Take some time to write out what it is that you want to share. It can be short and sweet (e.g. Mom, I’m transgender) or could be many pages worth of information. This is your opportunity to tell them what’s going on. We suggest including the following items in your coming out: how long you’ve known; that you’re still the same person; that you know it may take time for them to understand; and that you’re comfortable with answering any questions.

Imagine what it is that they may ask.
Try to put yourself into the shoes of the receiving parties. What is it that they may ask? Write down some answers to address the questions that you believe that they’ll ask. They may not ask anything, but at least, you’ll be prepared.

Choose the right time.
Whomever you choose may or may not be caught off guard by your revelation. To assist with making your coming out as transgender a positive experience, we suggest selecting the right time. This could be on a weekend or after a nice dinner that you’ve made them.

Go slow and be patient.
You have likely held this secret in for a long time. Try your best to take it slow when coming out. Speak slowly and remember all the things that you wanted to say. Be patient with yourself. Your emotions will come out and everything may not go exactly as you planned.

Show your confidence.
You are a strong individual who is allowing this person to know a little bit more about yourself. This is your choice to come out to them as being transgender. Be confident and know that you are the one leading the conversation. Share what you feel comfortable doing and allow them to go through their own reaction to the news.

No matter the result, keep being yourself.
Unfortunately, you can’t control the reactions that individuals will have to you coming out as transgender. It could be great, it could be sad, or it could just feel like nothing has changed at all. Either way, be proud of yourself for coming out and continue to be the amazing person that you are.